The whole point of free speech is not to make ideas exempt from criticism but to expose them to it.

Friday, October 26, 2012

God takes issue with those who claim to be doing the Lord's work

“I want to make one thing absolutely clear: Mr. Mourdock’s comments from last night in no way reflect my position on this or any other issue,” said the Divine Creator, speaking at a press conference this afternoon to address Mourdock’s remarks that rape-induced pregnancies were God’s intent. “And furthermore, I would like to take this opportunity to say definitively that I, God, do not officially sanction or condone the words or actions of anyone involved in the fanatical, conservative Christian faction that Mr. Mourdock represents.”

“Many people hear my name in connection with the Christian Right and start to assume we are aligned in some capacity, and I’m here to say, for the record, that we are not,” God continued. “So let me just be clear: I don’t want women to get raped—not ever. I don’t think their resulting pregnancies are my divine will. And if a woman is raped, then she has the right to get an abortion, period. I do not agree with Mourdock. I do not agree with the Christian Right. End of story.”

Calling Mourdock’s comments “the last straw,” the Lord Our Maker explained that while in the past there have been a few areas where He and the religious Right have been in agreement, more often than not, in recent years, He and Christian conservatives have grown “actually quite far apart” on a wide range of issues.


Ken Santema said...

Haha, I saw this on the Onion a couple of days ago. I have a far right-leaning neighbor that was trying to use scripture to show I was going to burn for not voting Romney (not voting Obama either, Go Johnson). Somehow he was trying to relate the Curse of Ham with the current Democratic Party. The whole conversation was weird and made me glad I am neither a bible-thumper or a Republican.

Bob Newland said...

It surely is becoming a more dangerous world out there for someone who doubts the water-into-wine and walk-on-water reports.